“I wish to have the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference between them.”

Adapted from Reinhold Niebuhr, Serenity Prayer.

I help women in midlife process the grief others don’t tend to notice: a parent declining, a friendship that ended, a move away from everything familiar, children leaving, your own health changing, or simply an undefined longing for what used to be. Nobody has died, so people say “At least…” or “You'll be fine,” and you end up stuck carrying it alone.

I'm a certified coach specializing in grief, with a PhD in psychology. Our conversations are gentle, therapeutic but not therapy. You don't have to make sense or know what you want. I listen, and when something starts to take shape, I ask questions that help you find words for it. In my experience, sharing your doubts with someone who can hold space for your emotions and isn't trying to fix things, takes off some of the weight.

I'm not trying to make your grief go away, and I won't cheer you up or hurry you along with advice. I'll still be listening when the people around you have run out of patience. For an hour or so, you can put down the load, take a breath, and then decide how you want to carry it. Only you decide what works for you.  

If what you're going through ever needs more than coaching, you won't have to wonder. My training means I'll be able to recognize if you need additional help. In fact, life coaching and therapy can complement each other beautifully.

I offer coaching in English and in Dutch, online and in person.

Maaike ten Berge, PhD